A seed of my family's heritage

I have an incredible family heritage of great men and women of faith!

My Aunty's blog 'Letters of hope' have been an inspiration for many, including myself, and I would encourage you to look through her site - the link is on the bottom of my page.

Her most recent one is a segment of study of how God foreknew, chose, called, justified and glorified His people...

This particular one that I am sharing from is "Called".

...Called! Another wonder-full word that, in the Scriptures, follows Chosen. In his letter to the Church at Rome, Paul explained the progression from God foreknowing us, to His choosing us, to His calling us, followed by our being justified and glorified! ...

...It is God Who does the calling, and He calls all those whom He has chosen to be His sons and heirs, conformed to His image and likeness, and prepared to reign with Him in His Kingdom. When we are convicted by His Holy Spirit, repent of our sin, and are “born again” of the Spirit, it is an indication that we are called to be members of His Body which is the Church...

...When He saved us, He called us with a holy calling, not according to what we did, or what we deserved, but in accordance with His own purpose and the free grace which was given us in Christ Jesus before the ages began...

...I think we have not fully understood all of God’s purpose in choosing and calling us, justifying and glorifying us, but He does give us some insights.

First of all, He has called us into His Kingdom and Glory and Virtue, to make us partakers of His Divine nature...

...“He has called us out of darkness into His marvelous light;” when once we did not have an identity, but now we are “the people of God…for the purpose of proclaiming, or making known, His perfections, virtues and praises”. (1 Peter 2:9,10)...

...We are called to experience the Peace of God, and Paul admonishes us to “let it rule in our hearts, and to be thankful.” (Col. 3:14, 15)...

...We are called unto liberty – the freedom wherewith Christ has made us free. Such liberty is to be used to “by love serve one another.” Even as we are called in one hope of our calling, we are to endeavor to keep the unity of the Spirit in that bond of Peace. (Gal. 5:1; Eph. 4:3, 4) ...

...Not the least of all of these is our calling “unto the fellowship of Jesus Christ our Lord.” (1 Cor. 1:9)“…Truly our fellowship is with the Father, and with His Son, Jesus Christ.” Can there really be anything more glorious than this? Intimate fellowship with our loving Heavenly Father, and our Savior and Lord Jesus? Even our Elder Brother? (1 John 1:3)...

(A response from Aunty Eulene in the comments...)

There is so much truth in the fact of God’s having chosen, called, justified and glorified us, His children. I have had no problem with the past tense of chosen, called and justified, but I didn’t understand how “glorified” could be in the past tense. Wasn’t that for some future state? It spoke so loudly to me that I checked all my resources to define what “glorified” really means. Words like honor, exalt, ennoble, laud, sanctify, etc. came to the fore. And then a shaft of “light” fell again on the fact that we believers are called “saints” and that He has raised us up together, and made us sit together in Christ Jesus at the right hand of the Father in the heavenly realm. I rather think that “glorified” (past tense) is quite in keeping with Father’s acceptance of us as His beloved children.

The love of God is greater far than tongue or pen can ever tell;

It goes beyond the highest star, and reaches to the lowest hell!

The guilty pair bowed down with care God gave His Son to win;

His erring child He reconciled, and pardoned from his sin.
Could we with ink the ocean fill, and were the skies of parchment made,

Were ev’ry stalk on earth a quill, and ev’ry man a scribe by trade;

To write the love of God above would drain the ocean dry;

Nor could the scroll contain the whole, tho’ stretched from sky to sky.
O Love of God, how rich and pure! How measureless and strong!

It shall forevermore endure, the saints’ and angels’ song.
F. M. Lehman

Thank you Aunty for the rich supply of blessings you are - you are the older woman who lovingly teaches the younger, your wealth of love and wisdom in God's Word is a treasure, and the poetry and hymns are like cherries of top! May God continue to bless you and keep you!

(an old photo of us when I was in Junior High)

Blooming 5

I had to show you this - the very plant that I had chosen to take photos of last month as I meditated on blooming where I have been planted - well, it hasn't bloomed at all!

It's an ironic and rather bleak picture of my life. I have been blessed, protected and loved, and yet others spring up all around me that bloom beautifully, while I still have nothing to show.

Father God! May I not be like this! May Your fruit and blooms spring forth from my life!

My Paraphrase of Proverbs 31:10-31

The heart of my husband trusts me confidently,
relies on and believes in me safely,
so he has no lack of honest gain
or need of dishonest spoil.
I will comfort, encourage and do him
only good as long as there is life in me.

I seek out the wool/flax of which righteous character is made
and I work with willing hands to develop it.

I rise early and get, through communion with Abba,
the spiritual food - loaded like a ship,
I set out the day's plans.

I consider new fields of interest and activities
and expand prudently
not courting neglect on my present duties.
With the blessings from above I am able to invest into the future.

I gird myself, not only spiritually,
but mentally and physically,
to ensure I am ready for every God-given task.

I can see with eyes of faith that my work with and for God is good.
My faith and complete dependence on God is ever burning,
The Holy Spirit helping me ward away fear, doubt and distrust.

I spin threads of which character is made and
weave in into lives - pleasing to God.

I have compassion for the poor and needy -
whether in body, mind or spirit.

I will not fear temptation or false teachings,
for my family is in God's hands.

I study and seek God out, that He may clothe me.

My husband is respected and finds favor in
all his arenas of influence.

I look for the needs of others and try to
provide for the need.

I keep my eyes fixed on Jesus -
which keeps me strong, dignified and secure,
and hopeful for the future of my family.

When I speak I trust God to give me the words I need,
I guard my tongue and pray the words I speak
be kind and wise.

I look well to how things go in my household
and I will NOT eat the bread of idleness.
I will not gossip or allow self- pity,
I will be content.

I pray that God meet my children's and husband's needs
and desires
through me.

May I be known as a woman who fears God,
a woman after God's own heart.

Quick NIV Read Prov.31

Proverbs 31:10-31
A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.

Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.

She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life.

She selects wool and flax
and works with eager hands.

She is like the merchant ships,
bringing her food from afar.

She gets up while it is still dark;
she provides food for her family
and portions for her servant girls.

She considers a field and buys it;
out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.

She sets about her work vigorously;
her arms are strong for her tasks.

She sees that her trading is profitable,
and her lamp does not go out at night.

In her hand she holds the distaff
and grasps the spindle with her fingers.

She opens her arms to the poor
and extends her hands to the needy.

When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
for all of them are clothed in scarlet.

She makes coverings for her bed;
she is clothed in fine linen and purple.

Her husband is respected at the city gate,
where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.

She makes linen garments and sells them,
and supplies the merchants with sashes.

She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come.

She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.

She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.

Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
"Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all."

Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.

Give her the reward she has earned,
and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

31:30-31 - Fear the Lord

Charm and grace are deceptive,
and beauty is vain (because it is not lasting),
but a woman who reverently and worshipfully
fears the Lord,
she will be praised!
Give her of the fruit of her hands,
and let her own works praise her
in the gates of the city!

Key to it all - fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom...

"Fear" in these contexts is not the scared fear - but rather the reverent and worshipful type of fear. Imagine the greatest daddy in the world - fair, loving, caring, makes time, provides ... you aren't scared of him, but if you do something that you know would displease him you have a fear of hurting him. Except this is much more magnified when you are speaking of the Creator of the universe(s)!!

-The Spirit of the Lord will rest on him,
the Spirit of wisdom and of understanding ...
(Is.11:2 - prophetic of Jesus)
-He will be the sure foundation for your times,
a rich store of salvation & wisdom & knowledge;
the fear of the Lord is the key to this treasure.
(Is.33:6)
-The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom,
and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.
(Prov.9:10)
-BY WISDOM A HOUSE IS BUILT,
AND THROUGH UNDERSTANDING IT IS ESTABLISHED;
THROUGH KNOWLEDGE ITS ROOMS ARE FILLED
WITH RARE AND BEAUTIFUL TREASURES.
(Prov.3-4)
-Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his commandments; for this is the whole duty of man. (Ecc.12:13 - King Solomon's conclusion - a man that has been deemed the wisest and richest King in history!)

May I consider the fruit - my children's love and grandchildren?
May I consider my works praising me - my children praising me?

And Abba Father, I know that You have plans for us, plans for hope and a future; I know that You complete every good work that You start; and I know anything that YOU haven't accomplished in me and my children is all for nought. I humbly come before You and invite Your Holy Spirit (Your Wisdom) to infiltrate everything we put our hands to, that we would be storing up treasures in heaven, that it would be in the gates of YOUR city that praise is given, and may it all be poured out at Your feet! As fun as it would be to be charming, and much as I long to be beautiful, make my heart's true desire and fulfillment to be one that reverently and worshipfully fears You. Amen.

31:28-29 - 'Blessed and Bless'ed

Her children rise up and call her blessed - happy, fortunate and to be envied; and her husband boasts of and praises her, saying, 'Many daughters have done virtuously, nobly and well (with the strength of character that is steadfast in goodness) but you excel them all.

OK, so I'm cheating and combining these.(I am also going to quote the footnotes in the Amplified Bible!)

'Many daughters have done ... nobly and well ... but you excel them all.' What a glowing description here recorded of this woman in private life, this 'capable, intelligent, and virtuous woman' of Proverbs 31! It means she had done more than:
Miriam - the one who led a nation's women in praise to God;
Deborah, the patiotic military advisor;
Ruth, the woman of constancy;
Hannah, the ideal mother;
the Shunammite, the hospitable woman;
Huldah, the woman who revealed God's secret message to national leaders; and even
Queen Esther, the woman who risked sacrificing her life for her people.
In what way did she 'excel them all'?
In her spiritual and practical devotion to God, which permeated every area and relationship of her life. (SO describes my sister! :) )
All seven of the Christian virtues of 2Peter 1:5-8 are there, like colored threads in a tapestry (faith, goodness, knowledge, self-control, perseverance, godliness, brotherly kindness and love). ...


In growing up I have come to the realization that my family isn't perfect; and that my children growing up loving, adoring and being grateful for me as their mom is not something I can assume will happen. I want to have the `blessing of my children thinking of me as a bless`ed woman.

So at this point I can't help but think of my mom with an ever increasing level of respect and admiration ... and must 'rise up' myself and say,
"Mom, you are a blessed woman who has always loved me unconditionally, shown undying patience, worked so very hard and diligently for, not only our family's benefit, but for others as well, teaching me compassion and love for my fellow man. Your integrity and honor have never waivered. You taught me God's love from His Word, and to love God's Word. God has been very gracious to me by giving YOU to me for a mom! I love you very much!"

Of course my husband also comes to mind. I have shared a lot about him throughout my blogging. God has used Roger's love for me to teach about His love. How it is always there unconditionally and shown in so many 'little daily things'. The praise Roger gives me comes from this unconditional love. I have come to believe that a man's faithfulness comes from within his own integrity and has very little to do with his wife. Unconditional love can be very comforting and is a blessing. Yet I confess that I also long to see the sincere pride in his eye when he looks at me, to be praised because he truly thinks I'm fabulous, and not because I'm his wife.

I don't wish to 'excel' all others, its not a competition, but I would love to hear these things said about me at the end of my days! What is said in the video 'Invisible Woman' (posted Feb.4) is so true - so much of what makes a great woman are things that are hidden and unseen to others - except by God.

Now, what can the 'church' of today take from this as the bride of Christ!?

31:27 - idleness

She looks well to how things go in her household, and the bread of idleness (gossip, discontent and self-pity) she will not eat.

Looking well into how things are going in one's household actually takes more energy then one may think, especially as the children get older and aren't 'under foot' any more. (at least when they are under foot you know what they are up to!) There is the cleaning (bathrooms, floors, laundry, ironing, mending, walls, windows, window coverings, light fixtures, furniture, cupboards, fridge, oven, storage areas ...). There is the teaching and training the kids in all the cleaning areas. There is the cooking ... the shopping ... the finances (more involved with a family business) ... keeping up on the medical welfare of everyone (more involved with special situations such as diabetes) ... Never mind the education, homework and friendships of each child ... and I haven't begun to list the training and teaching of the children's character - while dealing with personal issues! ... I often wish I could be a stay at home mom, and even not home school so that I can have all the 'background' work done when the kids get home and be ready to give them my undivided attention. OH! And we haven't even begun talking about being a wife.

Certainly, to run a household, maintain a healthy marriage and raise the next generation does NOT leave room for the 'bread of idleness'.

Yet I like it that the Amplified explains that bread a step further. "gossip, discontent and self-pity" - any of those three quickly hamper the atmosphere in a home. Sadly, all three are also all too common.

-If words are not to edify or build up (which can also be 'discipline' moms!), then it's best to leave it unsaid. Both my sister and I agree whole heartedly that much more is accomplished, and with much less stress when we take things directly to God, do our part as He directs and leave the rest to Him.

-Contentment has been in converstation's with my husband a lot lately. It should definitely be a sought after character trait! I believe that unless you are content with what you have, you will never find contentment with more. A lot of that can come from seeing the glass half full rather then half empty. Having a good sense of humor and ability to laugh at one self. To appreciate the roof over your head and the quick transportation - even if its rusted, falling apart and a tad too small for the people you transport... :)

-I believe that if you are guarding your words (preferrably starting with your heart and thoughts!), and you are practicing contentment, then the last - self-pity - is hard to experience. I have fallen into that pit on occasion and its not a place you want to be. Its that old attige(?!) - I complained I had no shoes till I met a man with no feet. Discontent and self-pity are closely linked.

One last thought regarding idleness ...
A body in motion stays in motion (excercise brings fitness and energy creating desire for more excercise....)
A body in rest stays in rest ( lazing around can lead to death!)

I just know these are terribly written - I haven't had a lot of time - but whatever - I wanted to go through it one verse a day and I will hopefully find some brilliant articulation to sum it up at the end ... or not!

31:26 - wisely used words

She opens her mouth with skillful and godly Wisdom, and in her tongue is the law of kindness - giving counsel and instruction.

Words. There is power in the tongue to heal a marriage or bring one to an end. It has been compared to a bit in a horses mouth and a rudder on a ship in scripture, for its power to control things much larger than itself. (James 3) Words release chemicals, electical responses and memory tree ignitions - whether positive or negative. (Dr. Leaf)

And the kinds of words that come out of our mouths can draw two very different pictures of a person (hence hiding my last two posts!). Jesus said that what is in the heart preceeds from out mouth, it's good to be very conscious of our thought life and what is actually proceeding from our hearts!

Here are some scriptures to ponder:
'Negative'
-For the lips of an adulteress drip honey, and her speech is smoother that oil; but in the end she is bitter as gall , sharp as a double-edged sword. Her feet go down to death; her steps lead straight to the grave. She gives no thought to the way of life; her paths are crooked, but she know it not. (Prov.5:3-6)
-...a quarrelsome wife is like a constant dripping. (Prov.19:13)
-Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife. (Prov.21:9)
-Better to live in a desert than with a quarrelsome and ill-tempered wife. (Prov.21:19)
-A quarrelsome wife is like a constant dripping on a rainy day. (Prov.27:15)
~~~
'Comparison'
-A wife of nobel character is her husband's crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones. (Prov.12:4)
-The mouth of the righteous brings forth wisdom, but a perverse tongue will be cut out. (Prov. 10:31)
-The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouth of the fool gushes folly. (Prov.15:2)
-The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, but a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit. (Prov.15:4)
~~~
'Positive'
-He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord. (Prov.18:22)
-He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity. (Prov. 21:23)
-Blessed is the man who finds wisdom, the man who gains understanding, for SHE is more profitable than silver and yields better returns than gold. SHE is more precious than rubies; nothing you desire can compare with her. Long life is in HER right hand; in HER left hand are riches and honor. HER ways are pleasant ways, and all HER paths are peace. SHE is a tree of life to those who embrace HER; those who lay hold of HER will be blessed. (Prov.2:13-18)
-Do not forsake wisdom, and SHE will protect you; love HER, and SHE will watch over you. Wisdom is supreme; therefore get wisdom. Though it cost all you have, get understanding. Esteem HER and SHE will exalt you; embrace HER and SHE will honor you. SHE will set a garland of grace on your head and present you with a crown of splendor. (Prov.4:6)
-Say to wisdom, "You are my sister," and call understanding your kinsman; they will keep you from the adulteress, from the wayward wife with her seductive words. (Prov.7:4-5)
~~~
-For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned. (Matt.12:37)
-This is what we speak, not in words taught us by human wisdom, but in words taught by the Spirit... (1Cor.2:13)
-Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve other, faithfully administering God's grace ... if anyone speaks, he should do it as one speaking the very words of God... [be careful little tongue what you say!] (paraphrased from 1Peter 4:10-12)


I can't help but requote Max Lucado -
'...if I clench my fist may it be only in prayer,
if I yell may it only be in praise...'.
We need to guard our thoughts, our hearts and our tongues -
bridling the tongue with kindness and love,
and then also with wisdom, discernment and understanding.

I began this entry a while ago - and am now in the midst of a mess that is centered on words - and I am afraid my words on paper has ignited a raging fire admidst relationships. I am sincerely sorry for the hurt and stress I have caused/added to. Once something is said it can't be erased.

Father God I pray that You would forgive me for the hurt I've caused to those You love. I pray that You would transform our hearts to truly 'esteem one another better than ourselves', to beable to 'be kind and forgive one another even as You have forgiven us.' Teach me how to pray for this division that the enemy is running with. May Your daughters truly seek You for skillful and godly wisdom and may we have the law of kindness on our tongues as You give counsel and instruction through us. Amen.

My ugly ranting - pt2

*IF you are going to read this at all - please read both parts through, AND my comment. Don't just read part of it as you will think me a whiny spoiled child!!!

On the way to get groceries there was a man and woman pushing a baby stroller that were trying to cross the street where there was no cross walk. The traffic was busy and I simply carried on through. I instantly fought tears and felt a heavy heart because I should have stopped.

These simple daily things overwhelm me at times and I find daily tasks difficult. Then I become angry because I'm quite aware that this is all ridiculous.

While shopping I did make a point of returning loose carts in the parking lot to the 'corral'.
Over the last month I have used all my personal savings on groceries, prescriptions, etc... I used the $20 worth of Sobey's points I had saved to buy a birthday gift for a friend/coworker/children's teacher. Now I have no buffer zone at all.

I went to the drug store to look for allergy medicine for Roger and picked up a $0.99 card and $0.99 stickers for my neice's birthday.

I drive a truck with a cab for three that I take myself and three children to school in every day. The transmission is showing signs of trouble and I have to undo my window to open my door.

I had increasing 'hormonal hair' issues since I started having kids. After having to shave my face daily, contemplating different treatments, hating to spend money we don't have on something so vain, and my husband insisting I go ahead with it - I have now gone for 2 - $150 treatments and am already seeing a great improvement. However, I fight guilt for this extravagance, particularily on days like today when my man's voice is raised, and I see him red faced and vibrating, trying to figure out how to pay our bills.
Crazy thing is, right after, he's talking about a new BBQ (ours is falling off its stand and he has 'jimmied' it for now), fixing the shower (that has cracks in it that we've tried to seal for a good 5 years, and have meant to do something with over the last 3 years), and a vehicle for me ($5000 range).
I spoke up today and said we don't have money for a BBQ, he pointed out that we need one - I said we just won't BBQ(we BBQ ALOT). When he started talking of the other two things I 'busied' myself away from the table.

I feel guilt for the $2 spent on my neice! AND I feel guilty for the pidly $2 gift for my neice.

I haven't even brought up the concern I have about the FBN books (Roger's business), how I struggle to find the time to keep up on them, and then the lack of confidence in doing them, and have woken up dreaming of losing everything because of my lack of knowledge.

I am like a jack of all trades - doing it all, but none of it well. Majority of the time lately I battle the thoughts of running away - abandoning everyone and living as a recluse; or throwing the kids in Public school, getting some mindless grunt job in the oil patch (would be good for my weight issues!), and focusing just on my immediate family.

I also get tired of being argued with by my children, students and husband. There are even times I restate something in agreement with them -'Yah, I know what you mean, its like...' - and then their response is as though we are in an argument. SO often I have thought to myself - 'just shut up Ruth, just keep your mouth shut!'

I know this all has sounded ridiculous. I know I need to
walk in
faith not fear,
love not duty,
heart not expectation.

I am ashamed of the last blog and this one, but this IS entitled "Ruthie's challenges"! I don't want anyone patting me on the back and reassuring me I'm all wrong, that they love me so much. The only one allowed to do that is my husband ... and you know today, he loved on me even though all weekend I have tried very hard to live in my own bubble. I am SO blessed to have him for my husband.

END OF RANTING!!!

Aware of Expectations-pt1

*If you are going to read this at all - you need to read both parts AND my comment on the end of the second - or you will think me a whiny,spoiled child!!

My Expectations of myself...
Proverbs 31 woman: (you'll see summary when I am done each verse)

As a wife: To have home stocked with what he needs, to participate his needs, to ensure sexual satisfaction at least every other day, to have him feel that I am fully behind him and that I only build him up, to have him think of me as beautiful, fun and smart.

As a mother: To always answer with love and tenderness, to always be there - putting down whatever I am in the midst of for their needs, to have the wisdom and discernment to know how to effectively discipline, teach and train them, to facilitate their dreams and goals.

As a staff and parent at the school: To always be at my best with coworkers and students, to fulfill my role well, to follow through with the ideas I have.

As a church 'member': To follow through with all the things I see needed - Sunday School teacher, back ground work and help, helping with social gatherings, visiting and having people over to my home, to physically help out in homes that need it ...

As a daughter: To care for and bless my folks for all they have done and for who they are - yard and house work, renovations, finances...

As a sibling/Aunt: To call regularily, to send cards and gifts consistently (or at all!), to be there at the drop of a hat when I can hear tiredness,etc. in their voice...

As a friend: To connect often enough to keep a friendship, to send cards and gifts at birthdays, to surprise with things like home made soup when sick or a gift of some sort just because.

Years ago my dad and I went for some special testing at a ... er, can't recall the right word at the moment, the high intense herbal drops you hold under your tongue... anyway... Mom has reminded me that my test came back very high in one particular area - awareness.

I am aware there are at least 2 families in my church that need emotional and financial support right now.

I am aware that my sister is battling cancer and I have done virtually nothing to help her out.

I am aware that one of my brother's life has been very stressful and I have done nothing to alleviate it.

I am aware that there is turmoil in the school and feel helpless to help, and that our finances are in great need and am struggling to do enough.

I am aware that my mind is often not on my work at hand.

I am aware that my 70 year old parents are still working - dad full time away from home, and my mom hard around the large home and land. My siblings have helped and blessed them greatly but I have done nothing - in fact, they still bless me with things like money to go to a prayer retreat!

I am aware that my neice and nephews on my husband's side don't know us and could probably care less because I haven't reached out to them.

My neices and nephews on my side are lucky if they even get a simple card for their birthday - and lets not bring up Christmas!

I am aware my kids are frustrated because they see their friend's with cell phones, allowances, holidays (outside country and not 'just' visiting grandparents), etc.

I am aware my husband feels that I never listen to him, that I am not a good steward of his home or money...

I am aware of my husband's frustrations regarding work, house cleanliness and finances, and am aware I fall short in alleviating any of it.

I am aware I have friends who are hurt because I don't keep in better contact.

I am aware of my many friends here in town that I always say we'll get together and yet never do.

I am acutely aware when I see a need and am not filling it.

I am aware that because I am not educated I am not bringing into the home what I could be - but that we can't afford me to get certified as a teacher...

I am aware that I am not present with my children the way I should be.

I am aware that I have not stayed on top of my daughters Type 1 diabetes, and largely blame my own issues with food for struggling to help her - and now my own daughter's health is at risk because of me.

I am aware I have been nothing but blessed and protected in my life and yet I have all these internal issues, while others are struggling with legitimate health issues, marital distress, job loss, etc.

I am aware of feeling like I do nothing right and I only disappoint. Yah, yah, I know, "Oh no Ruth! You are great! We love you!" ... I DO appreciate that,
but I am not living up to expectation and it is humbling and at times heart wrenching.

This summer I want to send Christine to diabetic camp (none of my kids have ever been to one), I want to spend time in Jasper with Samantha(something she has wanted for a year), I want to get my kids the shelving they need in their rooms, I want to spend at least one good week at my mom's helping for the August Long Weekend, I want to plan a fabulous bridal shower for my neice and have the greatest shower and wedding gifts for her. I want to visit my brother in Saskatchewan. I want to spend time at our new school helping out and volunteering. I want to visit Wagners, Walderns, Prestons, Davis', Moores, Stephensons, DeJongs, Whytes, Couturiers, Nahamkos, Gullions, Boysons, Paquettes, Hahns, Dycks, and so many more including neighbors ...

But instead I think I will be getting a summer job, hope to squeeze in diabetic camp and August long weekend, and try to get caught up on things like washing my windows ... and instead of making impacts that are meaningful and lasting, I will simply help get our family by for another summer.


Yes, I am aware of expectations - and am acutely aware when I fail.

That's why the email from Gloria regarding silver, and my Aunt's blog have been timely ... and somehow I will once again shrug this off and carry on in my daily actions that have to get done. Maybe one day the fog will lift.

(yes, a miserable blog I know)

Silver - do I believe?

(Family sent this to me and I just opened it...)

Malachi 3:3 says:
'He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver.'
This verse puzzled some women in a Bible study and they wondered what this statement meant about the character and nature of God.

One of the women offered to find out the process of refining silver and get back to the group at their next Bible Study.

That week, the woman called a silversmith and made an appointment to watch him at work. She didn't mention anything about the reason for her interest beyond her curiosity about the process of refining Silver.

As she watched the silversmith, he held a piece of silver over the fire and let it heat up. He explained that in refining silver, one needed to hold the silver in the middle of the fire where the flames were hottest as to burn away all the impurities.

The woman thought about God holding us in such a hot spot; then she thought again about the verse that says: ' He sits as a refiner and purifier of silver.'

She asked the silversmith if it was true that he had to sit there in front of the fire the whole time.

The man answered that yes, he not only had to sit there holding the silver, but he had to keep his eyes on the silver the entire time it was in the fire. If the silver was left a moment too long in the flames, it would be destroyed.

The woman was silent for a moment. Then she asked the silversmith, 'How do you know when the silver is fully refined?'

He smiled at her and answered, ' Oh, that's easy -- when I see my image in it.'

If today you are feeling the heat of the fire , remember that God has his eye on you and will keep watching you until He sees His image in you.

31:25 - strong, secure, dignified

Strength and dignity are her clothing and her position is strong and secure. She rejoices over the future - the latter day or time to come (knowing that she and her family are in readiness for it)!

Mmmm, 'strength and dignity are her clothing and her position is strong and secure'.

I'm pondering; I have always found it very easy to be transparent - to the point that I have had to be very conscious to protect my husband's desire for privacy; but now I am pondering just how much to share.

How my heart yearns to be this woman described here, and don't say its impossible, I have seen my sister do it for 36 years! To be strong, dignified, secure and confident ... I have my moments when I do sense clarity and hope, you can refer to my April 1st blog regarding 'The Fog'. Yet just this last week I had another 'episode' and found myself planning how I could end it while leaving the least problems for my family. My anxiety level seems to be running on high, although I have no call for it to, and I know this because of my thought life and emotional turmoil.

Our thought life is very important to our emotions and actions, I know this. So when I have thoughts that I know are absurd or false I do what I can to stop them and refute them. Yet the intensity of these 'moments' seem to increase. The lie is whispered to me that these negative things keep coming back because it is truth. Part of me wants to lay it all out there to be exposed, but that is just too dreadful of a thought, and to articulate it in a way that one may be able to begin to understand I would have to do it in those moments... and as much as I want my blog to be real and true, I also want it to be full of hope.

So today I will meditate on my Aunt's blog and leave you with an excerpt from hers...
...It is interesting to note how much the Bible has to say about God’s choices. Of course, being the Creator of all that is, as well as the Redeemer of the world, and being the inherent essence of Love, Wisdom, and Knowledge, it is unquestionably His prerogative to make whatever choices He pleases. ...
God chooses the “foolish things of the world to shame the wise, and the weak things of the world to shame the things which are mighty, and base things of the world, and things which are despised, and things which are not, to bring to nothing the things that are, so that no-one can boast before Him.”...
(Taken from "Chosen" - Letters of Hope)

This really hasn't been a well written blog ...
(I spent time writing two more blogs after the silver one ... trying to identify where these ridiculous emotions are coming from, but have chosen to hide them)

31:24 - baby slings

She makes fine linen garments and leads others to buy them; she delivers to the merchants girdles (or sashes that free one for service).

Entrepreneurship. This verse makes me think of my friend B and when she had a web sight to sell things like her wool diaper covers and baby slings that she taught herself to sew ... could be exactly described as 'sashes that fee one for service'. :)

31:23 - husbands...

Her husband is known in the city's gates, when he sits among the elders of the land.

Roger's name means "Mighty Warrior"; and his middle name means "Head Leader/Presiding Official". February 3rd's blog had me pondering names and the meanings of them and I shared my prayer for him.

A good man can do great things in his spheres of influence. Where does a wife fit in? The only verse linked to this one is Proverbs 12:4 "A good wife is her husband's pride and joy; but a wife who brings shame on her husband is like a cancer in his bones." Take a good man, wise, hardworking, a man of integrity and worth. But his wife is known to gossip, cause division, or is a lush or slut. What is that man now known for? Who wants to invite his family over for dinner or to an important meeting?

I want to be the wind beneath my husband's wings - as it were - to sit back with pride and dignity when my husband's name comes up, knowing God has His hand of blessing on him.

May my husband be known in all the area's of his influence, and find favor in all who know him.

31:22 - wedding clothes

She makes for herself coverlets, cushions and rugs of tapestry. Her clothing is of linen, pure white and fine, and of purple (such as that of which the clothing of the priests and the hallowed cloths of the temple are made).

Jerusalem rejoices because of what the Lord has done. She is like a bride dressed for her wedding. God has clothed her with salvation and victory. (Is.61:10)
Those who win the victory will be clothed like this in white, and I will not remove their names from the book of the living. In the presence of my Father and of his angels I will declare openly that they belong to me. (Rev.3:5)
Let us rejoice and be glad; let us praise his greatness! For the time has come for the wedding of the Lamb, and his bride has prepared herself for it. She has been given clean shining linen to wear (The linen is the good deeds of God's people.) (Rev. 19:7-8)

This may seem funny, but I think of Braveheart - the movie about William Wallace - and the little napkin that his wife lovingly prepared for him on the day of the wedding. A lot of the old traditions that have been lost in our new 'modern' society is a tragedy to me.

Our wedding day is coming soon with Jesus, what can I lovingly prepare for Him as a gift and token of my love? ...
...every work that is not done by Him will be burned away, so the best gift to give is to have a willing and ready heart to obey whenever His voice calls. :)

31:21 - Redemption

She fears not the snow (of temptation or false teaching) for her family, for all her household are doubly clothed in (the) scarlet (of redemption).

One of the references linked to this is the passage in Joshua 2, when the harlot, Rahab, hides the two spies in Jericho. They agree that she is to hang a scarlet rope out her window and when the time comes anyone in her home would not be harmed. Later in chapter 24 Joshua tells the people that "as for me and my household we will serve the Lord".

In our society today there is great temptation and a lot of false teaching. It is wise in the eyes of man and has convincing arguments. I have struggles of my own - I like the hope that as I battle it out for myself, that it is also being battled for my whole household.
1Cor. 7:14 "For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy." Phil.2:12 "continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling..."

But it is vital to remember where the redemption comes from. Hebrews 9:22 says that forgiveness of sins only occurs when blood is poured out. Jesus. Creator, God, Son, Man, perfect and blameless, took on my sin and my consequences in order to redeem me to Himself. When I am hid in Him there is no room for fear for my household - for His blood is more than sufficient!

Father God I thank You for Your grace and mercy and ask that You solidify Your Truth in my heart that I may live it out before my family. I pray that You draw each to yourself and for that blessed reassurance that I indeed can know that my household are doubly clothed in You.

3:20 - compassionate servant

She opens her hand to the poor; yes, she reaches out her filled hands to the needy (whether in body,mind or spirit).

3:19 - weaving character

She lays her hands to the spindle (spinning threads of which character is made), and her hands hold the distaff (making yarn to weave into lives pleasing to God).

Ah, a summary of mothers and teachers!
I love the visual of spinning and weaving into lives.
(picture of woman with both a spindle and a distaff)
I find my thoughts continue to go to God weaving in our lives, yet this verse talks about the woman laying her hands on the spindle and taking hold of the distaff. Spinning and weaving takes time, patience, faith that its worth the work and that it will be useful when you are finished. So does raising and teaching children. Sometimes all we see is the seemingly tangle of fibers, or the back side of an elaborate tapestry that just looks a mess. Yet if we hold fast and work diligently we will 'taste and see that our work with and for God is good'!

31:18 - Reliance on God (*You Are)

She tastes and sees that her gain from work (with and for God) is good; her lamp (of faith and dependence upon God) goes not out; but (full of the oil of His Spirit) it burns on continually through the night (of trouble, privation or sorrow, warning away such robbers as fear, doubt and distrust).

Without the Amplified version one may wonder how one should 'rise while it is yet night' AND stay up all night ... thankfully we aren't expected to do so - as I am terrible with no sleep!

My husband has said a lot over the last year that he has never regretted anything when it has involved God. When we are walking in communion and cooperation with Him we can truly trust that we will see the fruit of our labor one day and that it will taste good!

Trouble, privation (to be deprived of something, esp. that which is required; to be in want), and sorrow are definitely dark times in one's life. The verse gives no inference that the night won't come, but that we have a lamp that will give us light through it. During this dark night it is especially important to have a light because the robbers fear, distrust and doubt can completely cripple a person's life. And what is this lamp that can help us through? Faith and dependence on God.

My sister walks this talk. I confess I have struggled with all three robbers, and trying to 'man-handle' them has never been successful for me. I have distrusted my husband's love, I have doubted God and His Word, and I have lived in fear - as God has been showing me practically every day the number of responses I give out of fear. I have three children in this home where I have been allowing such darkness and invasion to occur ... yet God in His great grace continues to pull me back into His arms of grace (not without natural consequences).

My prayers are said, so rather, I share my sister's poem (and now song) that she wrote in December of 2001 and I still have posted on my fridge:

YOU ARE

Without Your filling I have nothing to give,

Without Your blessing, I have no way to live.

I need Your hand on my life every day

Teaching me Lord what to do, what to say.

You are my Strength for the pressures of life.

You are my Peace in the midst of my strife.

You are my Power enabling me to stand.

Your words, my assurance, You're holding my hand.

You are my Hope, that there's more than I can see.

You are my Helper, to get down on my knees.

Though life is so dark - You are my light.

When choices are hard - You're always right.

You are my Father, my Friend and my Fire.

You are my Strong Arm and burning desire;

My Foundation, my Fortress, in You I'm secure.

For everything that ails me - You are my Cure.

You are my Anchor in life's stormy sea.

For all that I need, Lord, You are the key.

The Lover of my soul, Precious and True,

Of all the world offers, none can compare to You.

By Rebecca Oehlerking

31:17 - fitness

She girds herself with strength (spiritual, mental and physical fitness for her God-given task) and makes her arms strong and firm.

Although I see my short comings in every verse, this one seems to hit home the hardest for me as the physical battle with my weight, and the mental battle with food and self-image, over shadows everything in my life. It is true that our physical bodies grow old and die, and that they are simply the vessels that carry who we really are - soul and spirit. But how we feel physically DOES very much affect our actions and quality of life.

31:16 - good business sense

She considers a new field (of interest or activity) before she buys or accepts it - expanding prudently (and not courting neglect on her present duties by assuming others). With her savings (of time and strength) she plants fruitful vines in her vineyard.

When I was in school I use to have a poster of some cute puppies, with one biting another's tail, the caption read "Don't Bite Off More Than You Can Chew". That is so easy to do in life, and each bite can be so good and useful! But filling our time with good things isn't necessarily good.

The Proverbs woman is a wise business woman,
thinking through her decisions,
ensuring what she does do she does well,
and knows how to invest into the future.

3:15 - communing with God essential

She rises while yet it is night and gets (through communion with her God?) spiritual food for her household and assigns her maids their tasks.

When I homeschooled I loved to be up early and have time alone. I would dig into the word, spend time in prayer and worship, and journal to the Lord. I would read this verse and regard my three children as my maids, and seek the Lord for the coming day's needs.

There are two scriptural lessons I have taken regarding 'rising while it is yet night' for that days 'food'. One is of course Jesus' example of seperating Himself for quiet times alone. Its easy to get caught up in the business around us, but it is vital to ensure we get that time in quiet meditation and undistracted communion with our Father. It rejuvenates, refreshes, renews and refills!

The other hit home when I taught Sunday School. I had been given permission to start at Genesis and take the kids through the old testament. We were at the part when God sent manna every day for the people to gather. The manna was the size of a coriander seed and tasted like sweet wafers of honey, so I went out and bought some coriander seed - they are tiny! I also bought some Frosted Flakes and broke them up little. The Isrealites had to gather about 2 liters every morning, so I also gathered as many 2 liter bottles as I could. During Sunday school I proceeded to spread the seed and some flakes all over the carpeted floor, and had the kids gather as much as they could. It was hard work and we personally never came close to gathering 2 liters worth! I had had the notion that God basically served manna to them in bed every morning and night - no cooking, cleaning or shopping - can I go there!? HA! Was I wrong in my perception. Gathering manna every day for that day's need took diligent work - gathering coriander seed size sugar wafers from the sandy wilderness would not have been easy. I am very thankful that I can talk to Jesus throughout my day, 'when I get up and when I walk by the way', and that seeking Him can be a lot of fun, like playing hide-n-seek with Abba. Yet I also believe that He doesn't serve us 'breakfast in bed' daily, that in order to grow it does take some work.

I have been looking up the verses that this particular Bible associated with each one, and I found this one particularily interesting, it leads to Job 23:12...
"I always do what God commands; I follow His will, not my own desires."

Hmm ... I could very easily set off on many runaways here!
Let me finish with Esther - I think of her because she was an amazing woman and example to us. During a women's prayer group a friend did some teaching on Esther and revealed something to me I hadn't seen.
Here is Esther, raised by her uncle, obedient and respectful to him, goes to the palace, where for a good year she is prepared to see the King once. If she pleases the King above all the other beautiful women she may become Queen. However, the number of women that are there, chances are that a woman would see the King once and then live her life out in the King's harlem, perhaps never to be called upon again, and never having a family.
"Before a girl's turn came to go in to King Xerxes, she had to complete twelve months of beauty treatments prescribed for the women, six months with oil of myrrh and six with perfumes and cosmetics. And this is how she would go to the king: Anything she wanted was given her to take with her from the harem to the king's palace. In the evening she would go there and in the morning return to another part of the harem to the care of Shaashgaz, the king's eunuch who was in charge of the concubines. She would not return to the king unless he was pleased with her and summoned her by name."
A lot of girls would take this opportunity and run with it - it may be their last chance - give a girl an endless credit card and the best stores - an opportunity to have what she always dreamed of - and a chance to win the position of Queen while you do it!!
However, that is not what Esther did...
"When the turn came for Esther (the girl Mordecai had adopted, the daughter of his uncle Abihail) to go to the king, she asked for nothing other than what Hegai, the king's eunuch who was in charge of the harem, suggested. And Esther won the favor of everyone who saw her."

If you aren't connecting the dots - Esther knew that the eunuch would have a better idea of what the king's likes were, so rather then indulging her own desires she only asked for what the eunuch suggested - and in doing so won the favor of everyone!

We too have the opportunity in ways to run with grace and freedom and live as we deem right - or we can take that grace and freedom back to the KING and ask what HIS desires are for us.

Father, May I not allow 'a little slumber and a little folding of hands' to grip me, but instead may I rise while it is yet night and commune with You for the day's needs and plans. May I obey Your Voice and not my own selfish desires. And may I follow through with the tasks I am to give to my 'maids'. I know You know what is best and I trust You. Amen.

3:14 - having something to offer

She is like the merchant ships loaded with food stuffs, she brings her household's (spiritual?) food from a far (country).

This woman is no simpleton with nothing to offer her family. She is loaded with great things, and that makes me think of leadership. I have often heard good messages preached regarding the need for leaders to get some quiet time to rejuvenate and refill ... but I'm jumping ahead to tomorrow's verse! :)

Just ponder and ask God what He's shipping to your family today via you!

31:13 -working for character

She seeks out the wool and flax (of which righteous character is made?) and works with willing hands to develop it.

-Seek, search, enquire for, strive after ... that which righteous character is made.
-Work to develop it ... even when someone is gifted in an area, to use it well takes work (practice) to develop it into a useful skill.
-Be willing ... and not work at it with a burdensome heaviness of a job, but with an eagerness to see the righteous character developed.

First in our own lives, then as the body of Christ, and of course with our children.

You will see many verses pull on my heart strings as a mom, and my love for home education.

The work involved here is very difficult.
When I was pregnant with my first child my sister told me the hardest part of raising kids was to be consistent - at the time I didn't understand why that would be so hard.

This entry seems very disjointed, but I feel I should share a personal conviction I have had in this area. It comes from 1 Samuel 2-3. Eli was a Priest ... "The sons of Eli were base and worthless; they did not know or regard the Lord ... So the sin of the two young men was very great before the Lord ... Now Eli was very old and he heard all that his sons did to all Israel and how they lay with the women who served at the door of the Tent of Meeting. And he said to them, 'Why do you do such thing? For I hear of your evil dealing from all the people. No, my sons; it is no good report which I hear the Lord's people spreading abroad. If one man wrongs another, God will mediate for him; but if a man wrongs the Lord, who shall intercede for him?' Yet they did not listen to their father. ... Why then do you kick My sacrifice and My offering which I commanded, and honor your sons above Me ... And I now announce to him that I will judge and punish his house forever for the iniquity of which he knew, for his sons were bringing a curse upon themselves, and he did not restrain them..."

Eli's speech sounds much too familiar to me.
Years ago I was convicted that I am a peace keeper rather then a peace maker - meaning I avoid conflict and prefer fake peace to fighting for true peace. Another on going work in me.
So I lecture my children, plead for their agreement, and then walk away ... not restraining them. A video I just watched with Roger with John Bevere touched on this very thing. Honoring our family above God has never ended well.

So I pray
Father God I thank You for Your mercy and that You are faithful to complete every good work You start. You hear my confessions and You hear me cry out that I do not wish for my heart to be this way. I invite the Holy Spirit to do a great convicting work in me as You transform me into Your image... May I love and honor You above all else, not just in my wishing mind, but in the life of my heart and soul. I pray that You reveal to me the wool and flax that I need to willingly work in my own life and that of my children to see Your righteous character shine through. In Your name Jesus, Amen.

31:12 - wind beneath his wings (*Choice)

She comforts, encourages, and does him only good as long as there is life within her.

What could you achieve if there was someone who always believed the best in you? Who loved you sincerely with grace and understanding?

When I was first engaged and married I had it all figured out - my, what I wife I would be! But then reality hit and my dear husband has put up with a lot. Its easy to get caught up in the games and emotions of life.

I want to be the one my husband turns to when he has had a bad day or a heartache. I want to be the one my husband can't wait to share good news with and laugh with. I want to be the one my husband feels safe to turn to with all the heaviness and ugly truths within him - knowing he can trust my love and confidence. I want, at the end of his life, for him to turn back and say 'she only did me good all the days of my life! I'm a better person for being with her.' I want to be the wind beneath his wings and quietly sit back with a grin as people awe at the wonderment of this amazing, soaring man.

This also reminds me of The Choice - by Max Lucado - its worth posting again... its good to sit back and check your priorities...

It's quiet. It's early. My coffee is hot. The sky is still black. The world is still asleep. The day is coming. In a few moments the day will arrive. It will roar down the track with the rising of the sun. The stillness of the dawn will be exchanged for the noise of the day. The calm of solitude will be replaced by the pounding pace of the human race. The refuge of the early morning will be invaded by decisions to be made and deadlines to be met. For the next twelve hours I will be exposed to the day's demands.

It is now that I must make a choice. Because of Calvary, I'm free to choose. And so I choose.

I choose love...No occasion justifies hatred; no injustice warrants bitterness. I choose love. Today I will love God and what God loves.

I choose joy...I will invite my God to be the God of circumstance. I will refuse the temptation to be cynical ... the tool of the lazy thinker. I will refuse to see people as anything less that human beings, created by God. I will refuse to see any problem as anything less than an opportunity to see God.

I choose peace...I will live forgiven. I will forgive so that I may live.

I choose patience...I will overlook the inconveniences of the world. Instead of cursing the one who takes my place, I'll invite him to do so. Rather than complain that the wait is too long, I will thank God for a moment to pray. Instead of clinching my fist at new assignments, I will face them with joy and courage.

I choose kindness...I will be kind to the poor, for they are alone. Kind to the rich, for they are afraid. And kind to the unkind, for such is how God has treated me.

I choose goodness...I will go without a dollar before I take a dishonest one. I will be overlooked before I will boast. I will confess before I will accuse. I choose goodness.

I choose faithfulness...Today I will keep my promises. My debtors will not regret their trust. My associates will not question my word. My {husband} will not question my love. And my children will never fear that their father will not come home.

I choose gentleness...Nothing is won by force. I choose to be gentle. If I raise my voice may it be only in praise. If I clench my fist, may it be only in prayer. If I make a demand, may it be only of myself.

I choose self-control ...I am a spiritual being. After this body is dead, my spirit will soar. I refuse to let what will rot, rule the eternal. I choose self-control.

I will be drunk only by joy. I will be impassioned only by my faith. I will be influenced only by God. I will be taught only by Christ. I choose self-control.

Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. To these I commit my day. If I succeed, I will give thanks. If I fail, I will seek His grace. And then, when this day is done, I will place my head on my pillow and rest.
Max Lucado - "When God Whispers Your Name" - chapter 11 entitled "The Choice" (- if I am enfringing upon copyrights, please contact me.)

31:11 - confidently trust worthy

The heart of her husband trusts in her confidently and relies on and believes in her securely, so that he has no lack of honest gain or need of dishonest spoil.

Does my husband trust me confidently in all areas of our relationship? Does he believe that I am faithful to him sexually - not just physically, but within my thoughts and heart too? Does he know I have his back; that regardless of the internal issues, that a negative word would not come out of my mouth about him, nor would I allow others to speak against him? Does he trust me not to waste our family's hard earned money on selfish and vain pursuits? Does he trust me to love him through hard times, to in fact prefer hard times with his honesty and integrity intact over having more from questionable practices?

And what about the church as a bride? Can God trust me as His ambassador to walk with integrity and truth? Can He trust me to listen and obey His voice? Do I have questionable motives in what I do? Do I compromise His will in order to try to gain Him 'dishonest' spoil?

These questions are hard.
I HAVE bad mouthed/gossiped/vented regarding my husband - do you know that he never has about me! He protected me to the point that the other men at the mill were referring to me as "Saint Ruth"! I recall when I learned that, the conviction I felt. The world is hard enough without tearing one another down in our own homes, and I have learned that it is MUCH more beneficial to take my concerns and gripes to Jesus quietly!

And I know that I have often honored people more then God, being more concerned of their feelings and mental understanding then God's truth.
I think of the people that have come to believe in Jesus under the false pretense that it is all about love and grace and mercy; and know nothing of obedience, sacrifice, humility, or the fear of God - would they not be 'dishonest gain'?

Lord Jesus, I want to be trusted confidently. Please convict me daily of actions that break that trust. I pray that You'd open my eyes to an opportunity today to build that trust - with You and my husband. Amen.

31:10 - role of men & women

"A capable, intelligent, and virtuous woman - who is he who can find her? She is far more precious than jewels and her value is far above rubies or pearls."

Religion has a bad name for making women inferior, but that has never been true of God. Yes, we are created as 'help-mates', and it is a physical fact that women are weaker then men. But is the heart any less important then the brain!? We are created to compliment and complete. We were not taken from the head to rule over man, nor the feet to be walked all over, but from a rib, close to man's heart to love and protect. There is freedom and blessing when living within the Creator's design.

We have done a great disservice to our men by trying to 'usurp authority' over their role and have left a lot of men emasculated. A project works a lot better and can be magnificent when everyone does there role well, but when there are those always vying for the lime light things usually fall apart, or at the very least, its not as great as it might have been.

We've also done a disservice to our daughters in allowing our role to be thought of as inferior and unacceptable. Our society pressures girls to feel that they need to have a career outside the home, which over the years has led to the authentic need in some homes for us to HAVE to work because the economics are geared for two income homes now. Don't get me wrong, careers aren't wrong, but the pendulum always seems to swing to extremes. My own daughters often comment that they aren't 'girly', as though being a girl is the most detestable thing.

Somehow we've gone from modest, skirt wearing feminine ladies
to women who think its great to flaunt their boobs as sex objects rather then life giving gifts, and love to make money at the expense of the other women who are at home, hurt, because, somehow, they are no longer enough for their husbands. I've watched programs (that I really shouldn't have) and have heard the arguments and perspectives. Believe it or not I do get it. In searching my heart, I think that if I had a 'deadly' body and no conviction of the Holy Spirit I would be one of the 'high class' girls. Hell! The money is great and who DOESN'T want to be SO wanted and desired! But where are you in the end? Where are these girls when they are 50, 60, 70 years old? And the TRUTH is - lust does NOT equate love.

Over the next 20 verses of Proverbs 31 you will see that God created women - NOT as lowly servant girls or door mats - but as incredible creatures that are CAPABLE, INTELLIGENT AND VIRUTOUS ...VALUED MORE THEN JEWELS, RUBIES OR PEARLS.

"Instead of asking, 'What should a woman do—what is her role?' it would be far more helpful to ask, 'What is a woman—what is her design?' and, 'Why did God place Woman in our midst?' " — John Eldredge (Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman's Soul)

Introduction Prov.31

"It is most unfortunate that this discription of God's ideal woman is usually confined in readers' minds merely to its literal sense - her ability as a homemaker ... but it is obvious that far more than that is meant..."
This is the start of the footnotes in my Amplified Bible.

Years ago, when my children were toddlers, Proverbs 31 was a discussion during a woman's prayer meeting. I had never taken note of this passage before, and my interest was sparked even more when a single lady shared how dear this was to her heart - in reading it with the perspective of Jesus as her husband. We also discussed the church being the bride and Jesus the Husband. Then I read the passage at my mom's in her Amplified Bible - of which I still have a copy of framed in my kitchen - 'a goal set before me'. Well, when something is up for awhile we tend to not take notice after awhile. I recently took the time to reread it while cooking supper and think it would be beneficial to me to spend this month meditating on the passage.

(Feel free to make comments too!)

PS - This is what Lemuel king of Massa's mother told him to look for in a wife.